Indiana Caliber Smile and the Quest For The Missing Fingertip

What a week.





I've learned a valuable lesson this week about the perils of tempting fate by making bold and outrageous statements such as "I'm Happy With My Life Right Now" because guaranteed some entity will decide that this is not acceptable. Therefore they shall cosmically intervene and render me stressed out in the extreme.

In fairness, there's people in my life who are worse off than me right now and my college compatriots are all just as swamped as I, so I do feel churlish complaining, however, I can't help but feel like the past few days bore an inordinate volume of stress making factors.

Since last I posted, i have been rather busy and some nifty and not so nifty things have occured.

In the nifty column are 2 gigs with Fifty Caliber Smile, one at the Bongo Club a couple of thursdays ago and one last Wednesday at The Ark. The Bongo club gig was a weird one as i played with the FCS guys at 8:30 and then played a completely different kind of set at 9:30 with my college band, The Stellar Groovetones. It was a good night all round with 2 strong performances, both of which i thoroughly enjoyed.

Also nifty was the fact that Kiera, my long suffering companion in time and space was in edinburgh for the day last wednesday and muchos good banter was had. We repaired to my friend Emma's cafe for a spot of breakfast and some chat and caught up on the happenings since she was last in my neck of the woods. It was to her that i claimed that i was happy and unfortunately she was not the only one listening.

On thursday last week, I was given the frighteners by one of our tutors at college who informed us that we only have until the 13th of June to complete and submit the remainder of our coursework. Fucking bugger! Way too much to do, not nearly enough time to get it done. Stress factor number one.

This was exacerbated (fancy word) in the evening by a phone call from Fifty Caliber Smile frontman exclaiming that he had, in fact, sliced a healthy sample from the end of a fretting finger, effectively putting our career on hold for a month. Another example of shitting bugger syndrome. Stress fact number two.

Number three? the phone provider orange failing to correctly show when my account is balanced correctly and sending me a bill for TWO HUNDRED AND SEVENTY POUNDS. Pretty fucking ironic considering they sent me a phone a couple of months ago that barely stays switched on long enough to actually make a phone call. Absolutely ridiculous. I managed to talk it down to near enough 100 bucks, however, that's a lot of money when you actually have none.

So these factors are strong reasons behind me feeling abit wiped out. The workload is heavy, but i have plenty to look forward to and keep me busy in the coming weeks i feel. Trying to be positive and upbeat and manage things in my own time. Smells like a winner. I'll probably write a bit more sometime soon when i have something halfway interesting to report. Roll on summer!

A week in review

Strikes and gutters man, strikes and gutters. More or less an accurate assessment of how my week panned out.

Remember i was meant to go and be at Alton Towers on tuesday? Aye, well the bus broke down at 5 in the morning just outside of carlisle. 2 and a half hours waiting outside of the bus in a layby while an engineer was dispatched to perform repairs. He was able to patch the bus up enough to get us to the services at carlisle and then there was the 3 hour wait for a replacement coach. Of course, by the time a replacement coach was dispatched, there was no point in making the trip to Alton Towers and so we came back. An absolute write-off of a day. Some salvage was made when we returned to Edinburgh as myself, Jim and Kirst, two of my close friends, took a bit of a wander around town, had a couple of drinks and dinner together then went and got ice cream. Sometimes all it takes to make a day better is the company and banter of a couple of good people, something i'm all too aware of.

Wednesday was largely spent catching up on sleep and taking it easy. My good friend rebecca came round and much Doctor Who and Peep Show was watched.

Thursday brought with it a last minute slot at a college gig for two of my bands, my main band Fifty Caliber Smile and my college outfit The Stellar Groovetones. A milestone in that i performed two sets (that both went smoothly) with two seperate bands and also failed to generate my token spikey hair. I think i looked mildly presentable despite this lack of grooming.

Speaking of gigs, some photographic work from the gigs at the weekend are now up and about online care of Stef Pryke, an absolutely outstanding photographer whose work is definitely worth a look...

Hibernation Sickness

Greetings,

A couple of things right out the gate. Firstly, i'm knackered. Really, truly, wiped out. Reasons for this will soon be apparent.

The second point which i feel is prudent to make is that my blog is precisely that. MY blog. It contains only my thoughts and opinions and do not reflect those of anybody else. I say this because the internet is a big place and you never know who is reading your writing and i feel that if i'm about to talk about how i spent a weekend and a pair of weekdays in the company of people and profer my own assessments of them then I should point out that it isn't the opinion of my band or friends, merely my own.

That's not to say that what i have to say is all bad, far from it. But anyway, to business...

Thursday : Thursday of last week, the 8th of may, saw me attend college through the day and play a gig in glasgow in the evening. College was the standard grind, fairly uneventful and filled with some reasonably good banter. There followed a car journey with drummer Carl and bassist Doug through to Glasgow venue 'Rockers' which in all fairness was a bit of a dive. The performance suffered from us being bored for 2 hours waiting to get into the venue, no clear organisation and having to deal with another band who we have little in common with. They're called Forsaken and are from Glasgow. Their music may be to the liking of others but it doesn't appeal to me.  They sound like 4 people who have been given the fritzl treatment but with copies of Metallica's black album taking the place of incestual abuse with an equally traumatic outcome.  Unfortunately I had to witness their musical stylings more than i'd like over the course of the four nights. We were, however, also sharing the bill with Lucretia Choir, who had a nice classic rock/metal sound and some top female vocals.  And so we get to...

Friday : Motherwell. the land that time forgot. time and fashion. And technology. And progress.

We played in the Starka bar. Typical mini skirts and tube tops downstairs, upstairs it was all camo netting and marshall backline. Epic. We played well, some good stage banter and interaction and a tight performance. But then on...

Saturday : I took a break from touring to work. A long day (9:30 - 7) and then returned to the world of gigging in the evening. Playing at Bannerman's in edinburgh and we were subject to the whims and wiles of a promoter called Sherri. I absolutely despise her. In her infinite wisdom we were put on last and thanks to Forsaken (or as the posters read 'Foursaken' which just reads like foreskin to me)  we didn't take to the stage until just after midnight. Thankfully it was busy and we were RAGING and managed to deliver a BLINDIN' performance. The evening was capped off with me standing atop the front of house monitors having a feedback soaked shred-out.  Smells like win.

And so to....

Sunday : Working AGAIN and then a train journey to Glasgow on my lonesome to play with the Fifty Caliber Smile lads at Ivory Blacks. I kept falling asleep on the train listening to joni mitchell. The big mistake in the ivory blacks layout is that there's enough room on the monitor platforms to plant one foot on the platform and then the other on the crowd control barrier. This was executed. I'll post a blog soon with some photos of this. For your eyes.

I'm writing this in the front room of my good friend Kirst's flat. We're staying up late cos at 3 in the morning we're going to Alton Towers. Oh yes, rather than spend my week working on college work i'm actually going to a theme park. How's THAT for procrastination?

More later in the week. Bye.

Stressbox

Things are causing me some major aggravation today. Music theory is making me blue, its tough for my little guitarist's brain to handle. I have 2 papers to sit in the next week and both of them are utter bastards.

I can't decide whether i should dilligently tackle college work for the next week or take a detour and go to alton towers with some friends on tuesday. Part of me thinks there won't be an opportunity to go on a trip for a while..part of me thinks i should just man up and get my work done.
Add to this the fact that i have 4 nights of gigs, commencing tonight. Details of these are on my band's myspace, myspace.com/fiftycalibersmile

If anybody gives a shit.

Sigh. Fail.

Strikes and gutters

A day of two halves. Well, i say two halves, it was really a totally shite morning and a distinctly average afternoon with one shining beacon of muchos happiness in the early evening.

The last thing i really needed today was to have to deal with a disgruntled customer. The thing of it is, i quite like my job. A lot of people assume for one reason or another that i don't. This isn't true, i really enjoy working where i do, except when i have to deal with appaulingly mannered customers.
The sequence of events ran thusly. A gentleman wished to book a recording session today and required the use of a session drummer. My employer assigned the task of recruiting the session player to a colleague who failed to do so and then passed the onus of responsibility on to me. In the one day i had available i did my best to track down a drummer but one day's notice is really not enough to secure the services of a musician. I strove to do so, was unable to and then to add insult to injury, was unable to notify the customer of the situation.

Today i was met with a disagreeable attitude from him as i attempted to clarify the situation to him. His logic was, that since i was the person standing in front of him, the absence of a drummer was in some way my fault. I would counter that it wasn't my fault, but there are other people who would like it to be.

I'm not really interested in alloting blame or pointing the finger of responsibility at anybody. That isn't my bag, but if it were, then i'd have to say that the responsibility indeed lay elsewhere. This made the man''s accusations all the more irksome, especially seeing as i spend a disproportionately small amount of my time at work. I can happily report that at the zero hour a drummer was recruited. I say happily, but his really shitty earring and unnervingly soft voice are both big ticks in the "cons" column.

The remainder of the day was suitably average by comparison. I pottered about, i played guitar, did a couple of lessons then came home. The source of happiness in my day? A top secret coded ninja e-mail from a close friend and musical confidante (and indeed bon vivant, they nearly rhyme ya'll) sketching plans and plots and schemes and hair brained ventures for future recordingness with the mighty Kirstyn Knowles. Plans are being made, plots being laid. The concept is flawless and will throw many interesting things your way AND ours. I can't wait til a summer of recording.

I also made a compilation cd for a best friends new cafe venture. Its going to be called the Treehouse in tollcross in edinburgh and the tunes will be PUMPING and the foods will be a scrumptious. Anybody who goes there will be a lucky lucky person.

Tomorrow i too will be a lucky lucky person. Mmmmmm. Latte.

Also, get your butts over to www.myspace.com/fiftycalibersmile and find out how you can catch me playing with this awesome foursome on a quad pack of evenings this week! gig deets are there, and you should check the choons too! A perfunctory youtube search for Fifty Caliber Smile will yield real actual video pictures of us too! In real life!

zzzzzz i need to sleep. This is starting to descend into farce. And its way too late for farce.

Right then.

Hello.

Quite recently, one of my close friends decided to start a blog. I fucking detest that word, with a passion. Its severely unimpressive, and just another example of a lazy culture.

However, the principle is pretty good. People who i don't see on a regular basis can read my erudite ramblings about the many and varied pressing subjects that weigh upon my mind. These include :

College and the volume of work

Music

My bands

Socialising

Alcohol

Women (and being fucked over by same, a rich vein of conversation)

The day to day happenings of a misanthrope (apparently, i'm a miserable bastard)



So yeah, i'll do my best to keep this updated. If i can think of anything cogent to say.



In the meantime, keep the peepers on myspace.com/guitarrampage (where this blog may also appear)



Check the deets on myspace.com/fiftycalibersmile regarding gig activity next weekend.